Thoughts on Emotional Dysregulation and ‘Drama’

First off, let me say that this oversimplfies things – a lot. My thoughts are clear in my head but I feel that what I am writing below does not accurately reflect them.

While at my doctor today, I suddenly came to a realization that a lot of my problems stem from my emotional dysregulation. I got on that track because I was talking about how dramatic I can be and how much of a drama magnet I am at times. She commented that a lot of her bi-polar patients seem to be drama magnets. As soon as she said that my thoughts went to emotional dysregulation.

Emotional dysregulation is one possible cause of ‘being dramatic.’ It involves emotional responses that do not fall within the ‘normal range’ of emotional response. What does it mean to be dramatic? Is not ‘overreacting’ and making something small seem to be the end of the world. Isn’t this something that is shared between the two things? People who have emotional dysregulation may at times come across as,or in some cases may well be, dramatic. Most untrained people cannot tell the difference between an episode and someone simply being dramatic.

When a person has a disproportionate emotional response to an external stimuli, it can often lead to negative feedback and results. This of course can continue to exasperate the situation and build on the initial response. It can draw similar reactions from people around us. It can pull them into our reaction, behavior, and our world. This is where the negative feedback and results comes in to play. People often act negatively to what they perceive as drama, they don’t like being around it or people who they feel are overly dramatic.

GRRR.. I am having trouble properly focusing my thoughts and saying what I want to say. I feel like my thoughts are jumbled, chaotic and disorganized.

As you know, I have a few ‘small’ anger issues at times. This of course is in itself often a result of emotional dysregulation. Most of my rage comes from situations where I take things to the nth degree and make way more out of them then I should. I react in a extreme way, well outside of social norms, in these cases the reaction is characterized by intense anger and rage.

The sense of ‘being a loser’, ‘being a failure’, that I have at times, is often initiated by a small event, something that should not invoke the reaction that I exhibit. Again, my emotions are out of control and I am not responding in a way that fits societal norms. I take what is something small and make it into an end of the world type scenario, with myself as both victim and villian, mostly victim though.

My anger outbursts and rage are mostly entwined with situations where my emotions are out of control. The more threathened or attacked I feel, the more I feel like a failure, the more likely I am to lash out in rage. The more intense dysregulation the more intense the rage will be.

I think I am on to something. Something that I will need to focus on going forward. I think controlling this part of my problem will help more than getting control of just about anything else.